i am gonna do this
and do it right!

four nights in a row that i spent out!
i am gonna meet with my ex-lover this week
who knows he might become the formal one!
i want himm so muchhh
and he knows it
and i knoow he wantsss mee!!
i am so cute in business outfit!
i also want the cameraman!
mucxx.

atv

so i don't mean u bitch!!

God be with us all!

PS: when i say all i mean those i like...thank u.

somebody gave me a job!
i am gonna be in a television station
i am actually gonna work!
god bless us all!
the end is close it seems..

not pregnant..
i am such a lucky bitch!!!
i should gamble more oftennn!!!

cold mountain
21 grams
monster
l'appartment
devils' backbone....
somewhere over there...

soryy could not write for a while
i was busy getting compliments!
roxyyyyy!

a real friend would want to know what's going on in your life because she cares about you,
not to satisfy her own curiosity.
shame on u.
ain't no friend any longer.

happy valentines.

i want someone else!
whom i have not met yet.
but soon.
still i am into this shit now.
i wish what i had was worth something but the cruel part is that it wasn't.
nothing is worth the shame i feel right now.
ok i lied!oh ym god i even lie to myself! true whore am i not!
i feel no shame that's the worst part not that it did not enjoy as much as expected.
i am a shameless bitch!
thank you.

here comes the bomb!
i fucked a friend!
a good friend of mine!
literally!now i feel stuck
do i have a boyfriend on valentines?
or am i mutating into a bitch slowly?
this site has no help just extends the wideness of questions in mind.
is this how i thought i would bewhen i was a kid?
all this college education, intellectual vision, all those books read, trips to different end of the same world...
and see what i have almost become?
not a student even.
you cannot name someone who does nothing on it a student although she is registered to college.
what am i thinking?
georgeous view of my apartment is no help...
many men on the same bed... all mine.
some good some worse.
friends are all dissapointments.
i swear they all are.
everyone is after something, minor or major.
but everyone is stocking me as if.
so what is most painfull is that i cannot tell anyone.
i really do want to talk to someone.
my ever first friend in life is the only one whom i could tell it all sincerely.
billy jean is not my love!but she says i am the one!
things would be much easier if thee were no one in the middle, a best friend and a girl friend is present.
oh my god!
i am the mistress!
i never thought i would be, there are obviously many other things,qualification i never thought i would posses.
life is full of suprises...
only suprises but nothing more.

i never thought such mistakes in timing would ever happen to me.
but you know
everthing is for the man kind.
mistakes also.
i just hope that it's not too late.
and i get to the heart of my beloved by valentines day
not that it means something but that it might if we come together then.

a night spent in the arms of the beloved...
a feel like shit still!
ok let's just deal...
i am gonna change starting tomorrow..
but might be a slow process.
apologies for the disturbance we cause to the environment.
thank you

tomorrow evening
party at my place
it has a theme of course
the exclusive "manti" party!!
oh peopleeeeee i love u too!!!
the paradox lies in the question: "how am i gonna cook for so many people?"
.........

got to go....
everyday is the same almost.
get up, breakfast, get dressed, go out , have fun...
come back many days later on....
maya is gonna kill me someday....

things get stuck sometimes.
sometimes doesn't.
but with me everything is always stuck.
why am i always in such a hurry?
what's the rush?
is it the 22?
is it me?
just wish time worked for me....
of course would get paid...

or may be it is too early to think at all!
i should not think about it....
it ....
see i am thinking about it.
fuck!

i know it is too late to think straight but i'll give it a shot!
i wantttt this to become true!
i need it so much!
i don't really care short term or long term
please god make this true!make it real!
make him mineeee!!

yes!!!
i think this is it!!
what i've been looking for!!!
loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

tonight is the night when two become oneeee!!

i hate myself when i let a friend down.
i hate myself right now.
i'm sorry dude!next friday total party!

it should be illegal for me to go outside in day time..
just like it is for vampires..
since they get burnt by sunshine, and i get burnt by shopping!!
oh god i bought a bag again!!!
save my soulll!!! if not my wallet!

last saturday i got a hair cut
too short!!
but too cute also!!
i think i seem a bit different now
more mature
but only seem so!!
cause i think i'm in love with my friend,
worse my friend's lover!
f.u.c.k. t.h.i.s. s.h.i.t.

what do i do when my love is away
does it worry cause you're on your own?

close your eyes and i'll kiss u
tomorrow i'll miss u
remember i'll always be true!!!

road trip...
shouting out loud singing this and driving 120 km/hr.

"close your eyes
give me your hand
darling, do you feel
my heart beating?
do you understand?
do you feel the same
or am i only dreaming?
is this burning?
an eternal flame
i believe it's meant to be darling
i watch you when you're sleeping
you belong with me
do you feel the same
or am i only dreaming?
but is this burning (burning)?
an eternal flame
say my name
sun shines through the rain
of all life so lonely
then come and ease the pain
i don't want to lose this feeling"


what?
can't i make mistakes?
feeling ain't there to be thought about.
are they?

22

weared?
not enough to explain these days.
confused?
besst word to explain me in these couple of days.
god... please do see me!
at some point!

unbelievable hours spent..
soon to forget
far to remember...