i love this city, wish beloveds were here too.

everyday something new is coming up! i am glad to be around! feeling free, kind of.
there are still things on my mind, dissapointment, future aspirations, hopes and believes...
just like any other ordinary person.
but this journey is one that those ordinaries would not go on with!
coward freaks!

i am where i wanna be
i wish my beloved did not have to go home and could stay here with me.

for the first time ever i gambled today
and won!!
the reason behind me losing my lovers has just occured to my mind; gambling.
the loser in club has become the winner in casinos i guess.
new phase!!!

the books i ordered on the 1st of this month have not arrived yet. i am really worried now. but on the other hand everything is going great. the term is over, and i have a visitor from home. we are going everywhere together. i am having a great time. but we are shopping too much i guess. so i am worried that my stuff won't fit into my bags on my way home. if i go home of course.

by the way i have been having some trouble nowadays
i wanna mention that
the thing is i am reading too much too fast which is a costly habit.
they always said read read read! reading is good, improve yourself. now i just cannot afford it financially!! all these books i got in my room!! who the hell is going to carry them back home!! will i stay or will i go? i have no idea.
and since saturday, i have been trying to control myself to not to purchase books since some of my books are on the way both from amazon and from home.
but i may loose myself at any moment!!!!

a day to the reunion.
big day tomorrow!! i have so much to handle, before the reunion.
kind of excited, since i will have someone on my side, although temporary, still feels good.

it has only been a few days since i freed myself from the papers to be written by writing them.
and since then i am on a roll!!!
i never had a moment to stop and think, i have been to the beach, to movies, to shopping, to have a cup of coffee over a few laughs with friends.
i like this.

now i will have more time to think about everything
when i say everything i mean somethings
oh life sucks, so does love.

it is time to submit the last paper of the term.
should i be prud?
i think i am only depressed.
i do not like summer.
every summer another disaster come to visit me not as a friend but as a foe.
scary ha! i got mail today, from the significant other. anyone who knows me knows there is only one significant other, this goes for anyone.
kind of cool though kind of tough, but definitely painful.

somersault- finally!!
today is my day
a local movie, a local novel
and come Cd's from the discount
nice day is today.
dinner tonight ,
nice italian dinner.
nice night is tonight.

this new phase is like a boomerang
just keeps coming back to where it first begin
all those tears for nothing
if he wanted me back would I go back
me asking myself this question is ironic enough
and yes I would go back
but not because of him
because of my love for the past anything good or bad if it is in the past i want it back
as if i would be the me i was then
that is never going to happen
i do not know what it is that makes me believe in me to go back
and why why why do i do this
after days of thinking of stupid stuff that had never occured to me before and now when i get a few words in the subject all of a sudden things change my focus my life changes because of something so little
this only means that i have not settled my life on hard enough grounds
is it too late to achieve this now
or am i who i am
someone who wants to go back.

so much has happened
nothing is a big deal anymore
it's because i have grown

what a nice weekend i had
just when i thought my hopes had vanished along with the words i typed all week
now one more to go
then i'll be free not as a bird but as me.
something is always better than nothing i believe.
my paranoias are coming and going
i am looking forward to the day they will leave me alone for good.

de-lovely!
i am quiet keen when it comes to musical.
i cannot keep back from loving it all.
including ghost-busters!

take my photo off the wall if it just won't sing for you 'cause all that's left has gone away and there's nothing there for you to prove oh, look what you've done you've made a fool of everyone oh well, it seems likes such fun until you lose what you had won give me back my point of view 'cause i just can't think for you i can hardly hear you say what should i do, well you choose oh, look what you've done you've made a fool of everyone oh well, it seems likes such fun until you lose what you had won oh, look what you've done you've made a fool of everyone a fool of everyone a fool of everyone take my photo off the wall if it just won't sing for you 'cause all that's left has gone away and there's nothing there for you to do oh, look what you've done you've made a fool of everyone oh well, it seems likes such fun until you lose what you had won oh, look what you've done you've made a fool of everyone a fool of everyone a fool of everyone

slept half the day!
unbelieveable
when time is so precious
i spent it on dreaming.

a new day
last chance to get this over with
oh please please something come here and inspire me!!

got 3 papers due friday
going to the movies in 30 minutes
got 1 hell of a character
and the guts.

i wish i had you with me.
just for the fun of it.